Visualization- a letter to Sharon

Dear, dear, Sharonee,

I believe today will be your second chemo treatment. I woke up thinking
about you. I'm thinking about you a lot these days, many times throughout
every day (and at night when I wake up my requisite
2 to 4 times!). And I want you to know what I am thinking about.
After several days of dwelling on fearful, worrying, concerned and sad
thoughts, I decided if I'm going to have you on my mind all the time, I
might as well make better use of the time and the thoughts, so I shifted my
focus. Here's what I do:

First, I visualize your lungs. I have no idea of what color healthy lungs
are, but I've chosen a nice calm, but lively, grey color. So, I picture
your lovely grey lungs as soft and flexible and clear of any impediments.
They are exactly what they are meant to be in the body of a (young!) woman
your age. I see them breathing in and out comfortably, filled with life and
and restorative oxygen that they then release to feed your body. Then I
picture your liver, for which I've chosen a rich purplish-pink color. It is
fully clear of spots or growths, resting in it's appropriate space and doing
what it does best (what exactly is that anyway?). Then I move along through
the rest of your body, doing a quick scan and visualizing healthy, fully
functioning organs and parts, all working to keep you healthy and whole.

And if my fickle mind hasn't already wandered off into some other realm,
then I move along and picture you as an aging crone, maybe 75 or 80 years
old. You are still your devilish self and zany as ever, but with a few more
wrinkles (and, sorry, a slightly longer nose - they do keep growing you
know). In my visualization you are quietly reflecting on that awful year
back in 2008-09 when you had to deal with those harsh chemo treatments to
fight off that unwelcome cancer, and you are feeling calm and grateful that
you did fight it off and that you continued to live a full and satisfying
life, surrounded by your loving family and friends.

So, today, when you come to my mind, I am going to visualize you seated in
that chemo chair, relaxed and comfortable, with the meds flowing directly
and only to wherever they need to be to most effectively heal and protect
you. The drugs themselves are a bright, spring green color, and they are
moving with your blood through your veins to spend some time washing your
lungs and liver with life and good health, taking with them when they leave
the vagrant, uninvited cells that should not be there. They are giving you
strength instead of taking it away (and they are moving really quickly
through your stomach so as not to disturb it).

Then I will picture you going home to a quiet, comfortable nap where you
will rest deeply and dream dreams of being well again. And I will picture
all your many, many friends and relations standing quietly around you as you
rest, infusing you with their love, comforting embrace and desire to do for
you whatever you need and want them to do.

Lots of love,

Judith

Welcome

Welcome to Sharon’s blog, a place where you can read updates about her life. Please leave comments on the blog and send a note of encouragement. Gary and Olivia will be writing the updates.

Sharon’s Medical Situation: Sharon had been having blood clots in her lower legs for a couple of weeks and the cause was unknown. She had been taking it easy, and then last Wednesday, October 16, she was having trouble breathing and went in to the ER. This is where they discovered that one of the clots had moved to the lungs, causing a pulmonary embolism. The chest x-ray also revealed a mass on the lungs, which we now know is cancerous. Further tests showed that the cancer has also spread to the liver. After further tests this last week, we now know that the cancer has not spread to other organs; the scan of the brain and pelvic region were negative (yes, many jokes have been made about how nothing was found in mom’s brain...)

The plan is to treat her with three different chemotherapy drugs intravenously. She began last Thursday the 24th. She will be doing this course of chemo for 6 months, with a three weeks on and one week off. She is seeing an excellent oncologist at Pacific Oncology and we believe she is in good hands. We are also looking into other ways of fighting the cancer, such as through nutrition. Any suggestions, advice, personal experience are welcome.

The outpouring of love and support is greatly appreciated. Thank you for the notes, emails, home cooked meals and for making our home smell like a botanical garden. Many people have offered to help make meals, do errands, etc. I am sure we will need your help. We will let you know more specifically how once we have it figured out.

For now, feel free to continue to send your love in letters or electronically to
1morgan1folker2roches@gmail.com or
morganfolker@comcast.net or
aleyna6388@hotmail.com or
oliviaroche@gmail.com

If you have any questions you can also email Olivia at
oliviaroche@gmail.com or

Peace to you,
The Morgan-Folker-Roche’s